Saturday, August 20, 2016

Latest Collection of SMS - Part 2

Posted by Sharath

Here I am sharing some latest collection of SMS (forwarded ones)!


A Boss Asks his Employee: “Do you believe that there is Life After Death?”.

Employee: “Certainly not, there’s no proof of it”.

Boss: “Well, there is.... After you left early yesterday to go to your cousin’s funeral, he came here looking for you.”



A Gujarati Company Owner was asked a question:🤔

"How do you Motivate your Employees to be so much Punctual"?

He Smiled & Replied:
 "Its simple; I have 30 Employees & 29 Parking spaces and 


Best Answer given by an Indian Citizen:

My Income Tax return form has been sent back because, in response to a question for 'Number of Dependents on you?', 

I replied : "65% of population who doesn't pay taxes, 21 million illegal immigrants, 9,00,000 criminals in over 1382 prisons and above all 544+ MPs in parliament" and 4000 MLA's of states.

They said, this is not an acceptable answer.
I am still wondering . . . . who the hell did I miss out!!


Police : why didnt you report your stolen credit card ??

Man : The thief was spending less than my wife!! 

Police: then why did you report now?

Man: I think now the thief's wife started using it!


Polymorphism explained better :

1) Father : Son, go and get Red Label.
Son : Full or Half? ..

2) Mother : Son, go and get Red Label.
Son : 100g or 250g? !!!


Innocence at its best. 

A small boy parks his bicycle nearby the Parliament house and walks on...

A police constable stops him and asks: Why did you park your bicycle here.... dont you know its a vip road and many mp's, sometimes cm's, PM & even President pass from here...

The boy replied: Dont worry, I have locked my bicycle.


Wife to hubby: Darling in pictures of Shiva-Parvati, Shiva has a Trishool.

In pictures of Vishnu-Lakshmi, Vishnu has Chakra in hand and pictures of Rama-Sita, Rama has bow in hand.

But in case of Krishna-Radha, he has flute in hand. Why is this?

Hubby: You see dear the three God's whom you mentioned first are with the wives. That is why they have weapons.

Krishna is with his girlfriend. Hence no weapons required. This shows when it comes to dealing with wives, even Gods need protection.


Marwadi calls Newspaper to print death of his Grandpa.

Clerk: Rs.50/word

Marwadi: Grandpa Dead

Clerk: Sorry sir, Minimum 5 words... 😌

Marwadi: "Grandpa Dead, wheelchair for sale"😃😃😃😃😃😃😂😂😂


Engineer 1 : Bhai need ur support.........
She is online n said "I love you"...Kya karu?

Engineer 2 : Bhai... Sabse pehle screen shot le...

Documentation bahut jaruri hai!!!


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